On July 22, 2012, I said goodbye to my brother Eddie. I’ve struggled to speak publicly about Eddie and his death. I didn’t want it to be about condolences for a loss or about the horrific illness he succumbed to in his final moments. Also, I felt very protective over the sacredness of the wonderful gift I received from Eddie in spirit. It was the gift of my awakening, of coming to my truth, of remembering the forgotten inherent wisdom that we are all vessels to house the Spirit of the Divine.

The body is a self-autonomous healing system. It is precisely what it was designed to do by the Supreme Creator. So why do so many question its ability to follow its divine purpose? Because we are really questioning ourselves. We question what God created because we have abandoned our faith and ability to access God consciousness within. Our bodies become ill because our minds have fallen ill.

When we are not in alignment with the Divine we will always project fear out to the world. This projection of fear is rooted in separation from our Source of Divinity. Those that tune into the frequency of this projection are in receiving mode to fears that are a match to their own. However, most of what gives rise to these subconscious fears are a result of past unhealed trauma. Consequently, it is not trauma alone that has activated these negative vibrations of fear in us, but rather being silenced in our trauma and feeling isolated with our pain that creates an inner voice of shame, abandonment, and unworthiness.

This voice becomes the author for the story we tell ourselves, where we cast a victim-hero-villain character dynamic. The reason that it is difficult to accept that we are creating our own illnesses is because of the subconscious counter-programming set in place that is dominated by the ego’s infamous victim-hero-villain story dynamic, where every conflict is funneled through this paradigm. Often, it states we are the said victim, our parents or perhaps spouse as the villain, and some external entity poses as the hero, whether it be a doctor, or a politician, or an ideology, or even the Source of Divinity we pray to - as long we hold the false belief that we are separate from this power. Whomever is assigned as the hero in this story holds the power of our WellBeing, keeping it out of our own reach. This relinquishes us of accountability over our own WellBeing because we all know that the victim does not hold the power to create the outcome.

In order to step into our creative powers over the state we desire to manifest, we must be willing and brave enough to step out of the victim role in our subconscious stories. Shifting into alignment with our higher self keeps us accountable for every choice we make and all that we manifest from the thoughts we hold. Accepting our anger and negative patterns is not about giving in to them; it's about the willingness to stand naked before our Self with unconditional love and own all of ourselves, authentically, compassionately, without shame.

You cannot subscribe to the belief that you create your own reality without also subscribing to the belief that you also create your own illness. Without clear sight of the darkness, you are blind to the light that resides within you. By virtue of owning your darkness, you come to remember how you chose the darkness in order to bring you to your eternal light. In a moment, your curse becomes your gift.

In my heart and soul, I’ve always considered myself a writer, yet, the words to speak on my brother have always escaped me. What I’ve come to realize is that I was unsure as to how much others were willing to receive, and this is because I was not fully receiving myself and my gift of transformation and healing. I was waiting for others to be ready to receive it as some validation that I was worthy of it. What keeps us from telling our story is we fear how much others are willing to receive, but when we wait for others to receive our wholeness, we are not allowing ourselves to fully heal and thus not returning to our wholeness from which we came.

When we are unable to heal, we cope. The methods of coping we adopt are all toxic and mask our authenticity. The path to authenticity is the path to healing. They are one in the same. Whatever self-limiting beliefs we have unconsciously adopted are in direct opposition to our authentic selves. People are afraid of what’s inside, they’re afraid of what they are going to see or maybe it’s what they think is missing.

A lot of people ask me what exactly happened to Eddie. I think they want the conventional answer where I tell them about the conditions that were out of his control. It’s hard to understand how someone whose happiness was so infectious and always became the life of every party had a deep sadness that tormented him. Nevermind his diagnosis of necrotizing fasciitis, because we are a society that has been well trained to meddle on the surface of things without really digging deep and so we are problem focused, not SOUL-ution minded. The diagnosis was pointing to something much deeper. I’ll go into the details of the dark medical sorcery of his death in the future, but for now…

What happened to Eddie is what happens to each and every one of us - he was unable to heal his past traumas so he did his best to cope until it suddenly and aggressively physically manifested and then medical sorcery brutally exploited the unhealed trauma - as they always do. The source of our health problems is our mind because that is what creates the conditions for illness to manifest. We must hold ourselves accountable for each and every breath we take; what energy we inhale and what energy we exhale; what beliefs we consume and what beliefs we dispose of - consciously discerning whether they are coming from fear, doubt, disbelief or from faith in unconditional love from God. This is what determines our Divine WellBeing.

It begins with the courage to ask ourselves and then being uncomfortably honest in answering these tough questions:

• Are we inhaling faith and exhaling gratitude in every choice and every relationship?
• Are we consuming nourishment for our spiritual growth and disposing of toxic energy?
• Are we setting loving boundaries and practicing alignment and grace?
• Are we stuck in lack of fulfillment from the life we are living or are we bravely following the wisdom of the heart?
• Are we extracting the lessons from our suffering and finding forgiveness or are we suppressing our trauma until chronic illness manifests?
• Are we learning the art of healing or simply following doctors’ medical sorcery orders to stay medicated indefinitely?
• Are we identifying more with our inner victim or with our purposeful Divine Creator?
• Are we contributing to the Wellbeing of others or are we contributing to their illness?

It was my mental breakdown that followed Eddie’s death that instantly shattered layers of false programmes in my mind and ultimately lifetimes of limiting beliefs that were cleverly woven into them which catapulted my awakening and forced me into my own unconventional path of solitude where these questions became the guideline for me to heal the heartbreak of my soul so that I can share this gift with others.

We need NOT be afraid of every bacteria, virus, disease, boogeyman that they throw at us to keep us in fear. What we do need to do is find the fears holding us back, be brave enough to dig deep until we discover and face our root pain, consciously create our own SOULutions for what ails us, and choose our wholeness where we fully receive our gifts and share them with the world.

This journey has led to becoming certified as a ThetaHealing practitioner in order to help others release negative programmes that are disrupting their Divine WellBeing. If you are looking to work on removing limiting belief programmes that are holding you back from coming into harmony with your mind, body, and soul, book a ThetaHealing Soul Frequency Activation session with me.

With Divine Love & WellBeing,

©2020 Melissa LaReyna